Conducting Ourselves

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We beg and plead to be used as an instrument.
We wish to symphonically communicate His magnificence to the world that surrounds.
We want to be dutiful demonstrators of His divine purpose and plan.
We long for the power of our tongue to palatize His irrespective love.
We desire to achieve a melodic influence with disciplined precision and timing.
But along comes the fine tuning.
Along comes the polishing.
Along comes the replacement of defective and worn parts and pieces.
Along comes the conductor’s selection, out of sync with and unfamiliar to our repertoire.
Along comes the direction – the ordering of our notes, when to sound and when to stay silent.
“But what about the chorus?” we exclaim.
“Why just a line or verse?” we protest.
Our seeming insignificance, irrigated by our irrefutable design and skill, quietly eliminates us from the divinely orchestrated lineup, giving way to a selfish serenade to soothe our wounded soul.
And after a season of accolades and encores, we again return to the master conductor, begging and pleading to be used.
And we are then, somehow internally gratified at the honor a single note affords.
– Tina Allen

Living A Life of Conflict

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We say we would walk a mile in their shoes, but would we?
If they were not designer, really, could we?
If we knew when they took them off, their feet were blistered and malformed,
Would we stop and give pause to the ludicrous thought,
At the fear of becoming forlorn?

We tell them we’ll carry them in our prayers, but do we?
As if our token “God bless” will secure them a victory;
As they war with dark thoughts that dance in their heads,
And dangle helplessly from a barren thread,
We bask in our favor as with death, they make a desperate decree.

We claim that fame is vile and unimportant,
Yet we scrap each day to obtain what we feel our due portion;
Determined to fight our impoverishment,
We gamble our winnings to yet again win,
As greed quietly instructs, our positions become distorted.

We desire to be used and are anxious to receive our assignments,
But we fail to see that first, we must become blinded;
To be willing to crawl although we can walk,
To have vision to see what we never before saw;
To be big is to become small enough to stand in a position of guidance.

– Tina Allen